The House of Hunt

In other news that comes as a shock to no one, good ole Kid Rock (or Sucky MacGee as I like to call him) and dear sweet Pamela Anderson (Terrible McFakeChest) have called it quits. A couple of random observations, as I have nothing else to do today and you’re being here proves that you obviously have nothing else to do but read the random thoughts that I think:

The split is apparently due to Anderson’s role in the Borat movie. According that link above, Kid Rock was enraged at her participation, going so far to call her a “slut” and a “whore.” While I shall refrain from such invective, it would seem that this is a situation of the kitchen appliances calling each other the same shade of black. This is the same Kid Rock who has referred to himself as the “Devil without a Cause,” the “Bullgod,” and an “Early Mornin’ Stoned Pimp.” Hardly a paragon of virtue, are you Kid?

And to be honest, wouldn’t you think he would have been prepared for just about anything by marrying Anderson? We’re not talking about Mother Teresa here. Baywatch? Barb Wire? Marrying Tommy Lee? Making infamous sex tape with said Senor Lee? Any of this ringing a bell Kid Rock? To be fair to Anderson, I would have thought that the warning signs would have been readily apparent before now.

Oh wait, you were busy being a stoned pimp. My bad.

One more thought: after this news, and the break-ups of Britney and Fakey Federline, Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Philippe, and who knows else this year, isn’t it about time to create a “celebrity hook-up/break-up name randomizer” generator? Every time the news week gets slow, some little midget in Hollywood could pull a level and the names of three or four random couples will be spit out, with some standard press release about the build-up or breakdown of their respective relationship. And it won’t really matter if said couple is actually together or not…all that matters is that they distract us from news that’s important.

For instance, imagine seeing the following headline: “Dennis Rodman and Katherine Hepburn Split Over Custody/Paternity Suit” The questions and water cooler conversations it would generate!! Katherine Hepburn? Is she still alive? Dennis Rodman? What color is his hair? They had kids? What color was their hair? Is Dennis Rodman still alive? What did they see in each other? Who wore the dress a the wedding?

All of that would be a brilliant way to make us forget the important news, like the slaughter in Sudan or the fight against AIDS in Africa and our own backyard.

For those of you confused by the title of today’s post, I’m going to be talking about sweet new music I tracked down this weekend. Conversely, I will not be talking about railroad ties that have been super heated by the sun. I know, I know…I’ve been promising to talk about smoldering metal since before ‘Nam, but you’re just going to have to be patient a little while longer. That discussion will happen, but at some point in the unforeseen future.

Now, on to the music!!

It was a Thanksgiving of EPs, as I stumbled across some jewels at the Earshot in Greenville, SC. Gaze in wonder at the magnificence of music that is now mine, thanks to their adequate selection and decent used section:

Thrice - Red Sky EP
I’ve professed my love of Thrice here before and I’ll continue to do so as long as the sun shall shine. This tasty EP features two b-sides from the Vheissu recordings, “Flags of Dawn” and “Weight of Glory,” as well as four live, mostly acoustic, tracks. This was worth the purchase if only for the b-sides (which are as solid and strong as anything on Vheissu), but live tracks sound great in their own right. I’ve been looking for this bad boy for a while and it is mine! My Precious!!!

Stavesacre/Denison Marrs - split/e.p.
Stavesacre is another band that I respect to the utmost. Their passion, music, lyrics…everything about them is incredibly inspiring to me. And as a result, I must purchase everything they’ve put out. This is a limited edition EP put out a few years ago, between Speakeasy and the phonetically spelled (stavz’a'ker). It features three tracks that made it onto that latter album, but with different mixing and production. I’m curious to give them a closer listen, because (stavz’a'ker) is the one Stavesacre album that I can’t sit through very often. The sound mix is pretty bad and just doesn’t sound much like the Stavesacre I know and love. So I’m excited about hearing these in an untampered format. Oh and some other band named Dension Marrs is on here too. Their drummer is now the current drummer for Copeland. From the first listen or so, I like their sound. Sorta spacey rock. I think I have a full album of theirs floating around the house somewhere…

Ghoti Hook - EP
This little puppy is just jam-packed with hard rockin’ goodness. Those of you into the old-skool Christian pop-punk scene (mxpx, Slick Shoes, Hangnail, etc) might remember Ghoti Hook from back in the day. This is the last studio record they made and it is killer. Some sweet rock riffs had infiltrated their music by this point, making this a beautiful marriage of punk sensibilities and rock hooks. heh…Ghoti Hook…rock hooks…heh. Yeah, I’m lame.

Red Orchestra Radio - The Electric Sleep EP
Last but not least, I came home to find this gem waiting for me in the mailbox. Red Orchestra Radio is a new band from Winston-Salem and I am always excited to come across solid music from NC-based bands. These guys do not disappoint. I initially heard about them because James Tuttle (of Codeseven fame) is a new member. I believe this is their first official release and it is fantastic. The music is somewhat reminiscent of Far-Less, along with bits of Alien Ant Farm (vocally) and Codeseven. A lot of layering (listen to this with your headphones on), complex instrumentation, and good ole fashioned rocking out, I’ll definitely be watching these guys.

And there you have it! Revel in my musically-induced awesomeness. And to those of my readers who are disappointed at the general lack of bizarre humor in my recent posts of late, to you I say, “Ni!”

I’m married to her. How did this happen? How did a guy like me get a woman this beautiful? I think there’s some sort of cosmic law that’s supposed to prevent things like this from occurring. And lest you forget, this is what I look like…

Yeah. Insane, eh? I love you April. Thanks for putting up with the idiot in the picture, the crazy man who you feed, and the weirdo who shares your bed. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You wanna get hitched all over again?

April and I got a chance to see one of my favorite musicians of all time this weekend: Jeremy Enigk. Holy cow. I’ve admired and respected him and his music for years now. This was the first time we’d ever seen him live and it was stunning. He played solo, no backing band or tracks. Just him and his guitar or piano. His voice was incredible, alternately powerful and passionate or quiet and gentle. I don’t know if I’ve ever heard a singer so on target in a live setting.

He played a selection of songs from both of his solo albums, a song from his soundtrack for the The United States Of Leland, and one Sunny Day Real Estate song, “How It Feels To Be Something On.” Fantastic. He was funny, gracious, and very humble on stage…and an awesome performer. I have no idea when and if he’ll be back through Charlotte, but if he does return, I’ll be first in line for tickets. Many thanks, Jeremy. Your art is so inspirational and beautiful. Please keep writing music for many years to come.

I had the opportunity to see Darren Aronofsky’s latest film, The Fountain, last night at an advance screening. There are times in a writer’s life where words seem utterly lacking. This would be one of those times. High praise can (and probably will) be tossed around, utilizing words and phrases such “masterpiece,” “stunning,” “visually gorgeous,” “compelling,” “deeply thought-provoking.”

Now that I’ve got those out of my system, how is the movie? It’s all of those things and more. I recently read in a Wired article on Aronofsky and the journey of this film’s development that he wanted to create something that injected life and wonder back into the sci-fi genre. He’s accomplished that and much more. Without giving too much away, Aronofsky has crafted a film that reaches down and returns to the deepest roots of what makes science fiction so powerful. The Fountain delves into some of the most intense questions of human existence: What does it mean to love someone sacrificially? What does it mean to die? What happens after we die? And conversely, what do the answers to those questions mean for us while we’re living? Is eternal life possible? Is death the end, or only the beginning?

Without giving too much away, The Fountain is, at root, a love story. It spans the centuries, but it is nevertheless a love story between Tom Creo and his wife, Izzi (played by Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weisz, respectively). Part of the journey of this film is unraveling the interwoven stories within the overall plot arc. For that reason, I won’t get into the plot that much. This movie deserves to be discovered fresh the first time you view it. I will say this about the film’s two main stars: While both are fantastic, this is truly Jackman’s movie. Don’t get me wrong. Weisz is incredibly talented and she brings her character to life with a grace and beauty that is both dignified and believable. But it is Jackman’s Tom who is at the center of this movie. His love for his wife drives everything he does. This is a man possessed with saving the life of the woman he loves. Jackman has elevated his career with this film and I hope he gets the chance to show off his chops more and more. While his Wolverine character is fantastic in the X-Men series, this movie should help him avoid being pigeonholed as nothing but an action/comic book star. Not that a career in those sorts of roles would be terrible, but his performance here proves that he has a lot more to offer.

I can’t recommend The Fountain highly enough. Film of the year? Quite possibly. It is undoubtedly one of the best that I’ve seen in a very long time. Aronofsky has put himself on my mental map with this one. Any and everything that he does after this will be required viewing from now on. To him I say, “Thank you, Mr. Aronofsky, for creating such a beautiful and moving piece of art. As a fellow artist, dreamer, and believer, I am in your debt.”

The following is an actual conversation I had the other day with a 5 year-old.

Ben: Jeremy, are you a veterinarian?
Me: No Ben, I’m not. Animals are cool, but I’m not a veterinarian.
Ben: No, not animals, are you a veterinarian?
Me: No, I just told you, Ben. I’m not a veterinarian. We had some cats when I was younger, but I’m not an animal doctor.
Ben: No! Are you a veterinarian? You know, do you not like to eat meat?
Me: Ohhhhhhhh, you mean a “vegetarian.” That’s someone who doesn’t eat meat. No Ben, I’m not a vegetarian either. I like meat too much not to eat it.

Man, you gotta love kids.

As an update to yesterday’s news item about the ginormous KFC logo in Nevada, I have taken steps within the last 24 hours to ensure that any extraterrestrial force tempted by the lure of tasty chicken will think twice before setting foot (or sucker or claw or gooey tentacle) on earthly soil. Presenting the Hunt Handlebars of Doom (now massive and equally visible from space):

Located in the neighboring Utah desert, just adjacent to Colonel Sanders’ visage, the image of my face will ward off unwanted alien advances for centuries to come. As an added bonus, it will also confuse legions of Mormons and will usher in a new era of facial hair growth amongst said burgeoning tribes of polygamists. Huzzah!!

I just wanna bang on a pan all day.

Remember that OK Go video with the treadmills? Well, this video is just like that, only the six members of this group actually play the household object they’re messing with. This is awesome. This is creativity.

Or just a bunch of Swedes holed up for the winter with a lot of time on their hands.

I……

Wow. This post pretty much writes itself. KFC revealed their new logo via a giant image in the Nevada Desert. So after we humans wipe ourselves out through nuclear (or if you’re George W., “nucular”) holocaust, this will be our legacy. Fantastic. Cause nothing says “human lickin’ good” like a monstrous shot of Colonel Sanders as seen from the Moon. Now serving all aliens!